1. After your humans give you a bath, DON'T LET THEM TOWEL
DRY YOU! Instead, run
to
their bed, jump up and dry yourself off on the sheets. This is especially good if
it's
right before your humans bedtime.
2. Act like a convicted criminal! When the humans come home, put
your ears back, tail
between your legs, chin down and act as if
you have done something real bad. Then,
watch as the humans frantically search the
house for the damage they think you have
caused. ( This only works when you
have done absolutely nothing wrong.)
3. Let the humans teach you a brand new trick. Learn it
perfectly. When the humans
try to demonstrate it to someone else,
stare blankly back at the humans. Pretend you
have no idea what they're talking
about.
4. Make your humans be
patient..... When you go outside to go 'pee', sniff around the
entire yard while your humans wait.
~ Act as if the spot you choose to go 'pee' will
ultimately decide the fate of the
earth.
5. When out for a walk,
alternate between choking and coughing every time a strange
human walks by.
6. Make your own rules.
Don't always bring back the stick when playing fetch with the
humans. Make them go and
chase it once in a while.
7. Hide from your
humans.... When your humans come home, don't greet them at the
door. Instead, hide from them, and make
them think something terrible has happened
to you. (Don't reappear until one of your humans is panic-stricken and close to
tears).
8. When your human calls you to come back in, always take your time. Walk
as slowly
as possible back to the door.
9. Wake up twenty
minutes before the alarm clock is set to go off and make the humans
take you out for your morning pee.
As soon as you get back inside, go back to bed
and fall fast asleep.. (Humans can rarely fall back asleep after)
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This page was last updated on - September 08, 2000